Inside the DOAR – News of the Flock

We’ve had some exciting events in the life of many of our staff members recently.  

Executive Director Elizabeth Brunstein  married Paul Banta on April 28.  Project Grandcare Director Patricia Domingues received her Masters degree in Social Work from ASU.  

Generations Director Donna Heppermann’s daughter Ann worked on a documentary on immigration that aired on National Public Radio and was awarded a Peabody Award.  Her daughter was one of those accepting the  Peabody Award at the award ceremony held on Monday, June 4, at the Waldorf Astoria in NYC.

VICaP Coordinator of Services Therese Muehlstedt became a grandmother on the birth of her daughter Monique’s son Kai.  Development & Administrative Assistant Elaine Dinse welcomed her newly adopted granddaughter Joy Chan Zuan, brought by her son and daughter-in-law from China.  Joy is now 15 months old and doing well in her new country. 

And VICaP Executive Secretary Carol Houselog reports that her son Ryne just got his drivers licence and her daughter Cassie bought herself her (first) new car.

America the Beautiful – Unity in Diversity

One of the joys of being an outreach coordinator for Beatitudes Center DOAR is that I am privileged to meet and work with people from different faith traditions and backgrounds.  In being out and about for Beatitudes Center DOAR,  I have become more aware of  and have experienced the diversity and richness of the cultural fabric in the Valley of the Sun.  Indeed our Valley reflects what Harvard University Professor Diana L. Eck documents in her 2001 book “A New Religious America:  How a “Christian Country” Has Become the World’s Most Religiously Diverse Nation.” 

While that comes as a surprise to many, it probably should not be.  For a cornerstone value of our nation since its founding has been freedom of religious expression.  Indeed, that freedom is one off the strengths of our society.

One of the benefits of living in a religiously diverse community  is the opportunity to learn about and get to know one another.  And interestingly enough, by expanding one’s knowledge of other traditions one often gains additional insight into one’s own.  So how do we meet folks from other traditions and interact in a meaningful way?

 I’ve found an excellent way to do this is to plug into the programs of the Arizona Interfaith Movement, founded by Dr. Paul Eppinger in 1995, and dedicated to building bridges of understanding, respect and support among diverse people of faith through education, dialogue, service and implementation of the Golden Rule.  Check out AIM’s website  at www.interfaitharizona.org for background info and program schedule.

Building bridges

A cursory look at the newspaper or the evening news on TV or a quick check of the major stories which pop up when we check out the internet tells us that there is a lot of misunderstanding and stereotyping going on in the human family.  So much conflict, so much heartache.   That’s why I found a recent Dr. Phil segment I stumbled upon on TV intriguing.  He had put into “Dr. Phil’s House” a group of people who professed to hate (the actual word they used) what I guess each of them believed to be their opposite.  There was the obese young man who hated thin people and a very thin young woman who hated fat people, a white fellow who professed to hate blacks and a black who hated white supremists, a straight guy who hated gays and a lesbian who hated gay-haters….you get the idea.

Of course, as the program went on one saw the blindness of stereotyping.  And after some very painful scenes to witness, one began to see the psychological basis for such attitudes:  the old primordial fears that seem to be a part of our genetic memory, the insecurity regarding oneself that stems from them and the coping mechanism (albeit a counterproductive one) of adopting an attitude of superiority or dislike/hate for “the other.”

Well, being in that house together and having some “tough love” intervention, some of the participants began to see themselves and their own insecurities more clearly.  Some also could then see the  ”object of their hate” as a total person, not as the  stereotyped image they had projected onto the person.  With that insight, some were then able to break out of their confining psychological box where they had walled themselves in by hate and a sense of separation.

Pretty powerful process to witness.  And how vital for the future, indeed the survival of our world, that more of us come to that self awareness and growth ouselves.

What to do when Dad can’t drive anymore

I know from my years in counseling families as an attorney and now as an outreach coordinator at Beatitudes Center DOAR that one of the most difficult dilemmas facing people as they grow older is when they need to give up driving.  That can be a very traumatic experience, particularly when it threatens one’s independence.  For most of us, we would like to remain living in our own homes–familiar surroundings with our own stuff around us (sometimes too much stuff, but never mind), personal items which hold a lot of memories.    But when one can’t drive, well, not only can one not just “get up and go” when one wants to, but the most basic, necessary tasks can become a real challenge.

I know that from an example that hits close to home.  An elderly relative of mine  had to give up driving because of macular degeneration in one eye.  Her village, 20 miles from Madison, Wisconsin, has no grocery store nor medical facilities.  The upshot of it was,  although she is otherwise hale and hearty in mind and body, she decided that she needed to move from her home of 70 years, to a senior living facility that provides transportation, so she could get her own groceries and have transportation to medical appointments assured.

Well, happily, because of one of our programs at Beatitudes Center DOAR, our VICaP Faith in Action program, folks in that situation in our Valley can get the help they need so they can remain living in their own homes.  VICaP Faith in Action matches trained and insured volunteers with homebound adults in their neighborhood or traffic pattern.  Some volunteers take people grocery shopping.  Others provide rides to medical appointments.  And other services such as mail sorting, bill paying and minor home repairs are available, too.

Thanks to VICaP, thanks to the volunteers who reach out to help a neighbor, no body has to leave their home just because they can’t drive anymore.

    

June to December –

This morning when I opened the patio door, a refreshing breeze wafted through the living room.    Two new waxy white blossoms on the top of the saguaro in our front yard were being enthusiastically visited by three bees.  To my delight, I also discovered that the hummingbird who had built her nest in the chain of our outdoor chandelier last spring has returned.  There she sat, motionless and proud, atop her nest.

June in the Valley.  The time we residents plan our July or August vacations to escape the desert summer heat.  At our office, however, Eva Scholfield, our developmental director, is turning our attention to DECEMBER!   We’ve started planning our  (17th Annual) POINSETTIA TEA to be held Sunday afternoon, December 2, at the Hilton Scottdale Resort, 6333 North Scottsdale Road, Scottsdale AZ.  (Mark your calendars.  This popular event, a relaxing moment with friends and family as the year-end holiday season approaches, is always a sell out.)

“You are starting our planning for December already in June?”, I commented.  “December will be here sooner than you think.” Eva replied.

How like life in general.   Whatever our stage in life, the “December” times for ourselves or our loved one’s seem to come sooner than we thought they would.   The lesson for all of us is that, just as with our Poinsettia tea, we each need to plan ahead of time, whether for that empty nest, for retirement, for possible diminished capacity.   Yet, studies and polls reveal that most of us spend more time planning vacations than we do for life’s contingencies.

That’s why we  offer a workshop, free of charge, called “Getting You Affairs in Order” as a guide to the process.   In fact, one of the joys of working at Beatitudes Center DOAR is that we have helpful information and resources to help people plan and be prepared for a variety of circumstances.  Knowledge is power, after all. 

And our programs can give hands-on, practical support.   Whether it’s  grandparents who have found themselves unexpectedly being the primary caregivers of their grandchildren, or a person who has had to give up driving and needs help to get to the grocery store, or a caregiver spouse who needs a little respite or to look into alternative housing arrangements, we can help.  

Inside the DOAR

When our Executive DirectorElizabeth Brunstein Banta approached my desk at Beatitudes Center DOAR one late May afternoon to tell me that our Board member
Larry Cummings thought we should start a blog  sometime in June and that maybe I could be the blogger, well, it was a novel idea–for me, personally, that is.  Born before computers could readily be carried onto an airplane ( when?  Let’s just say my driver’s license would not make me a card-carrying member of Gen Y, or X ,for that matter), it was a bit of a stretch.  To start blogging, for me, would be somewhat of a special event.

No longer having the oracle of Delphi to consult for the appropriate date for this launch,  I did the next best thing–consulted Wikipedia.  

 

June 6 clearly emerged as the date for auspicious, successful beginnings:  the Allied Invasion of Normandy in WWII (1944),  the founding of the YMCA in London (1844), the founding of Chrysler Corporation(1925)  (well,  two out of three ain’t bad)

And to tie in with the cosmos, June 6, 2002, marked the day a 10-foot-in-diameter astroid exploded over the Mediterranean, between Greece and Libya.

June 6 is the birthdate of my father, and I found out just an hour ago, of Larry’s father as well–two fine accomplished gentlemen.  Indeed, without them having been born into the world, we, that is Larry and I, wouldn’t be here to blog with you.

So welcome to a look Inside the DOAR!